3 Day Weekends & Tuesday

Is this a curse? Am I being cursed? I don't know if it's a blessing or a curse that I haven't gone to school in a while. But it's not my decision, it's all in the clouds. It hasn't snowed at all, just really cold and icy. That's why I haven't gone to school. But I went yesterday, and I thought my days of staying home were over. Until I checked the weather app on my phone. I didn't believe it at all that I would be staying home today, because yesterday evening it was somewhat sunny, but cold. I guess it's just that Texas weather thing. But what do I do on days like these? I had planned to go to school and now all there is to do is flip through the news stations to hear them talk about the same thing. From now on I am planning for days like these.
But now I'm thinking ahead, 12 days ahead.


In 12 days, If I can count correctly, is the first mountain bike race of this season. Last year, waking up to the smell of last nights campfire with a soaked tent wasn't the best way to start out. It had rained the whole night and my tent flooded. It was also freezing. The races are on Sunday morning, so everyone's out there the day before. These races are usually in Smithville, Huntsville, and every "ville" in Texas. The second time it was almost below freezing with the same tent, so I slept in the car. Third time it was beautiful weather at night, but my dad and I stayed in a motel, along with Westlake, who has riders that are still learning to ride a bike. But that's how it is, deal with the weather or go home. The pros deal with it, except they sleep in a tour bus.

So I think 3 Day weekends are sort of a good thing, because it helped me think, think to plan ahead.

Is it cool?: Marfa, Texas

Recently, Marfa is supposed to be a really cool place. There's nothing out there, but it's cool. It's a desert town that is extremely unique and secluded. I visited Marfa before it was "cool", back after No Country For Old Men came out in 2007. Before all of the weird art and New York millionaires moved there for it's "peace", everyone went there for the lights. I'm sure people still do, but not as much as they did before. But is it still cool? I'm still wondering if it's now worth as much for the six hour drive to stay in a teepee or airstream for 100 bucks a night. Of course it's turned into a liberal hotspot for hipsters, driving out every last grandpa for his 1832 bachelor pad. But I see it as a good thing. Too many tourists want to go to these exotic places to spend thousands of bucks. Or maybe that it's just far away from everything. Many of the big city newcomers said that it's placid environment is one of the main reasons for moving there. But why Marfa? In Texas? I don't know man, but if I move there, I'm going to create my own burning man festival and the real burning man won't even be good for the new Star Wars set. It's cool

Teleportation

Teleportation is something I had been dreaming about since a few hours ago when I woke up and didn't want to walk to the shower. I mean I could just open my eyes, press a button and WOOSH, I'm in the shower. I never thought that it would be possible, but I know it will be. Like, there's that hamburger thing in a tube and cloning of things and 3D printers already, so why can't there be teleportation? There's also even the idea of teleportation! It's been around forever and in movies and so many attempts. So there's no way that it cannot be done. Star Trek, Jumper, Harry Potter, Power Rangers, X-men, Napoleon Dynamite (almost) are all movies where teleportation exists. If you could teleport, there would be no reason to drive, walk, fly or do anything. Teleportation would also have  problems too. Like, nerds hacking it, prices of the whole thing, immigrants, stalking, and more illegal stuff. But, everyone who traveled would be tracked and the teleporter would be run my the government anyway. And then, it's not even fun anymore. But, it would still be cool.


Dear Obama, please make a teleporter so that I may take a shower effortlessly.
Sincerely, your biggest fan, Elias. 

25 Accurate Predictions for 2014

This year in 2014, I have some predictions for this year, even better than the Washington Post's. These predictions aren't bold, they're real and they will happen.

I'm Jesse Ventura, and this is CONSPIRACY THEORY!!!


Paula Deen is sick and is in the hospital for 2 weeks.

Psy comes out with some new Asian thing, but it isn't as big.

Dennis Rodman becomes a North Korean citizen.

SNL does something on Dennis Rodman this weekend.

George Bush dies (old Bush)

Jimmy Fallon is on top for late night TV

Facebook Dies

 The Cardinals or Reds win the World Series this year.

Smart cars die.

Hipsters in Austin flee to Buffalo and Portland.

50's hip hop and R&B begin a new era

Tupac comes back, he was living in North Dakota under the Alias "Rukahs Caput"

Old TV shows come back, as reruns

David Letterman retires, Bieber has new show.

The Texas Longhorns go 11-2 for the new season

More athletes come out of the closet

Rhinos become extinct

Life on Moon

Blackberry goes Bankrupt

GM Thrives

iPhones aren't a hot commodity anymore

Coffee prices skyrocket

Gas prices plummet

The Aztecs reveal an apocalypse date

Board Games become a thing  

Do I have a serious illness?

As I was searching some home remedies on the internet for a runny nose the other day, I stumbled upon WebMD. WebMD is a site where you can diagnose yourself with every sickness ever known. Or at least that's how I see it. There were some really weird illnesses that had very broad symptoms, which I had. Some of these broad symptoms were runny nose, drowsiness, headaches, and it turns out I've got it all. From osteoporosis to heart disease and everything in between, I'm pretty sure I have it.

Even things like drinking coffee, staying up too late, eating too much of this or too little of that can cause serious problems. But then, there are those "once a day" things for old people on TV that have names like ricaricac, spingloa, trencfolab, unvariten, viagra, glentravier, exventroa, ring a bell?
Well, those cause even more problems once you take them, like "Coughing, sneezing, farting, an erection lasting more than 32 hours, headaches, nausea, vomiting, death, diarrhea, stuff like that. But don't worry! Your life threatening illness will be long gone soon enough!

No thanks, but I'll live with the runny nose.

 I'm not sick anymore, but when I was, I think I should have just popped open a can of Campbell's soup and dealt with the runny nose. I'll do that next time, and you should too. Don't go to WebMD, just call the oldest person you know and ask for some weird voodoo remedies, and you should be fine. 

I want to go camping.

I haven't been camping in years. For me, that's something that never happens. Well, I guess the last time I stayed overnight in a tent was a few months ago, but the reason wasn't to camp, it was a mountain bike race, and there are no Holiday Inns in the middle of nowhere. And real camping too, not a campsite with driveways with you between two RV's and showers down the trail. That's not camping. Camping is when there are no water faucets around and nowhere to plug in your iPhone. But the point isn't to live like Bear Grylls, it's to have fun, like everything is supposed to be. Here are some places I would like to camp.

1. The Sahara Desert

     What better place to prepare for my first Burning Man by camping out in the desert like Zero in Holes. There's tons of nothing to see, and there's no entrance fees! Just make sure to bring some shades.

2. Antarctica
     One time I saw this documentary about penguins and how they function as a society. There's also this dancing penguin that sounds like Elijah Wood there. Might want to bring a sweater.

3. African Rain Forest

I've always wanted to camp here. The African Rainforest is where Fruit Loops were invented in 1776. There's a museum that campers can visit to learn about the talking dodo bird that was the country's bird, until it's extinction. Don't forget your bathing suit for the beach!

Can the average blogger make a living from Google Adsense?

Many people have blogs online. Really if you think about it, almost everyone has a blog. It's either their rants on Facebook, Twitter, or some other site where you can talk with more than 140 characters. But you can't make any money talking about how good that movie you watched on Netflix was or how this band you found makes you the coolest person on earth. Nobody cares.

But if you're good at talking about pointless things, you just might be able to make a few bucks. And that's all you'll ever make.

Some people have really good things to talk about and have said that they have made over 300k from Google Adsense within a span of 8 years. That's a lot of money. But this person is serious about what they do. They post daily, twice a day even, and it''s formal and important to some people.

This blog is also important, to me at least. But not so formal. It's possible to make just as much money too, but it is very hard for the average blogger like myself. So about how much am I banking from blogging?

Hey kid, read my blog

About $1 in the last 4 months.Which concludes the myth of the wealthy average blogger. They don't exist. The only living someone could make from blogging would be on the streets. MYTH - BUSTED